How To Save Your Marriage In The Current Financial Crisis?

By M H Ahssan

Keeping a marriage or long term relationship strong requires a lot of effort on the part of both the partners and can be quite hard. And if we add the current financial crisis that is being witnessed on a global scale to the mix, it can turn out to be a disaster for many couples.

Mallika and Tanay have been married for three years, but recently things have not been so great on the home front. She complains that he doesn't spend enough time with her and would rather hang out with his friends, whereas he complains that it's all in her head and what she wants is a husband who does not have a life outside of her. All this was going on for a few months but by and large they were able to sort their differences and stay happy for the most part.

However, the current global financial crisis affected Tanay's business considerably as most of his clientele was from the US. He in turn started asking Mallika to cut down on their monthly expenses and tighten their belts. Now with money issues too coming into the picture, even the littlest of arguments gets out of hand and results into a full blown fight. They were having their problems even before the financial crisis, but where they could deal with their issues rationally before, now that seems impossible.

It is the same case with thousands of couples. Thus, here is some advice that may help you to prevent your marriage from falling apart in the current financial scenario.

Financial Advice To Tide Couples Through The Global Meltdown
- Make saving a habit: You were saving 15% of your salary before this crisis occurred but now you're not saving anything. This all or nothing attitude can really hurt your marriage. Even if you cannot save what you used to every month, at least save something. So, if 15% is not feasible now, save at least 5% of your income each month. It's not so much the amount that you set aside, but more importantly the habit of saving even when the going gets a little tough. The crisis won't last forever and when you're a little flush with cash, you can always up your savings.

- Have a Plan B: With most companies trying to cut costs, the first thing to happen is job cuts. If you should happen to get laid off, it can add tremendous strain on the best of marriages. Thus, while you're working your Plan A, give some thought to what you would do if you happen to lose your current job. Basically, put a Plan B into place. Create your resume, do some research and know what your options are. If the worst does happen, at least you won't be sitting on the couch and complaining (while your spouse goes to work), but will be doing something concrete to make money.

- Don't let romance take a backseat: It's easy to romance your partner when you can spend on lavish dinners, go for romantic holidays, and buy expensive presents. But since all this may not be possible right now, it is easy to let the romance fly out of your marriage. But make sure you don't let that happen. There are ways to connect intimately without spending the big bucks. A nice little candlelight dinner at home, a quite walk with your beloved, romantic picnics in the park, a heart felt love note - all these are ways in which you can express your love without spending too much money. Be creative!

- Keep a record of your spending: Most couples are at a loss of how they can cut down on their expenses as they believe that they don't do any 'faltu kharcha' to begin with. But, if you start tracking your spending by writing down where each buck goes, you'll be amazed to see how much money you spend out of habit that can easily be cut down.

- Don't be afraid to dip into your savings: If things get really bad, you can dip into your savings to tide you over the current financial crisis. But remember that you should do so as a last resort and only if you have no other option left. Also keep in mind that you're going to dip into your nest egg only for expenses that just cannot be avoided. For instance, if you're behind on your home loan payments, if a medical emergency comes up etc. And no, your yearly trip abroad doesn't count!

Most importantly, if you do have to remove money from your savings, be ok about it and know that you’ll put it back when times get better. After all, you were saving for a rainy day right? Well, the rainy day is here!

5 Great Romantic Indian Hotels - Fall In Love Again!

By M H Ahssan

Re-discover your love and refuel your passion by visiting any of these 5 Great Romantic Hotels in India. These hotels are gorgeous retreats that have not yet been run over by enthusiastic tourists. Their isolation is one of their most appealing traits. 3 of them have even featured on Forbes' list of great Indian hotels!

Devigarh Palace Hotel:
The phrase 'heart-breakingly beautiful' was definitely coined for this amazing palace resort situated in Delwara, half hour drive from the city of Udaipur. Set atop a small hill, the fort palace is surrounded with beautiful lush gardens on one side that are perfect for taking long romantic strolls with your partner.

Highlight: If you get a strong sense of deja vu upon seeing the hotel, and having never been there before, don't start imagining possibilities of 'punar janam' and all that! Amitabh Bachchan's 'Eklavya' was shot at almost entirely at this hotel and hence the familiarity. If your spouse is crazy about the Big B like most of India, it will be like the proverbial cherry on top!

Hotel Rajvilas:
Situated in the pink city of Jaipur, this hotel is the best of the Oberoi Vilas hotels spread across India. Choose from gorgeous luxury tents for an exotic romantic holiday with your lover, or go with one of the dazzling villas for the ultimate in privacy. Either way, you'll be so busy re-igniting your passion that you may just not want to leave!

Highlight: This is one of the cheapest 7-star properties in the world to stay at during the off-season. A great way to romance your spouse without breaking the bank.

Wild Flower Hall:
Situated in Shimla, this property was once the summer retreat for the British Babus. Today, it is a stunning hotel with remnants of the Colonial Raj. The great service and helpful staff go to any lengths to make your stay memorable, making you feel like Royalty.

Highlight: Adventure buffs also have the option of mountainous treks and mountain bike riding; that is if you can make time off from all the activity you'll be getting inside your hotel room!

Amanbagh Hotel:
A scenic two-hour ride from the city of Jaipur will bring you to Amanbagh Hotel, which is truly a desert in the oasis fit for maharajas and their ranis. Haveli type rooms, landscaped gardens, peaceful surroundings, and the loving ambience of the hotel will surely put you in the mood for some steamy passion and romance!

Neemrana Fort Palace:
An hour and a half drive from Delhi will bring you to this awe-inspiringly beautiful fort-turned-palace hotel. Having the distinction of being one of India's oldest heritage hotels, the Neemrana Fort Palace has every modern convenience you can imagine.

Cut into a small hillock, the hotel offers various steeped terraces and walkways for much-in-love couples. You can have complete privacy with your partner. The staff is so discreet that you'll wonder if there really is any! Even if the hotel is absolutely full, you'll still feel like the last two people on Earth!

The Thematic Wedding Affair

By Ayaan Khan

Not too long ago, Indian weddings were mostly about ostentation and lavish display, often bright, bold and beautiful in a glitzy sort of way. An event most looked forward to from time immemorial, a wedding today is not just an occasion where family elders get go together and bring about the amalgam of two destinies and families.

It’s no longer just about vows and diamond rings or a treasure trove of expensive, cherished things…it’s the making of memories woven with moments of love and celebration, meticulously orchestrated with everything that is designed to create a castle of pure fantasy. And central to all of this is a theme that runs right through often from the rituals to the reception. Yes, the era of ‘themed’ weddings has made its advent into the Indian wedding landscape in a big way and is evidently here to stay.

While the diva of all fairy tales, Cinderella, remains a great favourite of NRIs and other culturally aware people, there are the odd takers for more adventurous themes like beach and underwater themes. Today you can have your pick of wedding themes ranging from fairy tale romances, religious themes, Arabian fantasies, culture centric festivities and even astrologically determined combinations.

For instance, the marriage of a well known industrialist in the North is said to be have been centered around the number 7 which was elegantly woven into all the elements, right from the choice of the cards, the wordings on the invitation, the décor to the food.

Another wedding held in the South, also that of an industrialist was held on the 25th, a number that adds up to 7 synchronizing with the birth date of the bride and had 7 as its theme. At the entrance stood seven beautiful young ladies welcoming each one of the guests. The décor used the seven colours of the rainbow, reflected by a majestic fountain. There were 7 stalls representing 7 cuisines from various states of the country and the give away packets contained seven items.

The various ceremonies that were held prior to the reception numbered 7 in all, giving the bride an opportunity to dress herself up in 7 different ways, from a beautifully brocaded salwar kurta, to lehengas and sarees worn in different ways. Said the blushing bride, “Number 7 has always been an auspicious one for me and I want its benefits to spill right into the heart of my marriage.”

A number of weddings opt for themes that incorporate the Bollywood elements of song and dance. From the invitation cards, the dress and ensemble of the bride and groom along with close friends and family, the décor, the floral arrangements, the festivities and entertainment everything bears the stamp of clever co-ordination.

The success of a thematically conceived wedding celebration is based on two factors – the choice of the event management company and the budget, both of which are in a sense interdependent. You can’t be choosing a high profile event management company if your budget does not permit it and in case such a firm would hardly be willing to operate on a shoestring budget considering the spectrum of activities it involves itself in, from the moment the choice of the venue has been made.

Theme weddings can start anywhere from Rs. 3 lacs to 1 crore and above. The sky is virtually the limit here. Once the concept has been decided, everything else simply falls into place in the hands of an experienced and competent wedding planner. It is just a matter of how much one is willing to pay for the unfolding of a fantasy that is designed to take one’s breath away while keeping the memory of the event of a lifetime alive in the minds of every invitee, your own included of course!

Unmarried Indian women and their woes

By Samiya Anwar

Besides being single if somebody asks of my opinion I would say married people are happier, loving, secure and stable, also kind in nature". It is just may be because I am still in the list of spinsters. However I observed many times if married respected, if not people question, suspect and doubt.

Life is not easy though, single women is one who not only is independent and enjoys life but also laughs easily who cries thoroughly, who often feels angry and lonely, who is strong and weak, who is brave and scared, she feels wanted, she deserves happiness. Because, they are more committed than men, they have more desires than need to marry, have a career and everything they want in life.

Although women of todays are fighting over all the stereotypes, they are also utilizing their skills in making career. It cannot be denied women are very successful in the present day in every sphere. From academics to sports, research to arts, every where women have shown potential abilities but still the life of women is no easy. They are stressful not stress-free. There are “too many expectations” from her in the family and world. It is something like your own family, relatives, neighbors, friends constantly badger you with “too many questions” if you remain single say close to 30. The pity looks of uncle-aunties scare you and bother. You end up occasionally losing sleep worrying about the future. You no longer feel happy when your cousin gets marry and a friend have a kid. A kind of covetousness fills inside. What to say and whom to say. You get screwed. You either slip into depression or start busying your mind in other work. Moreover get confused.

We can see there are relatively large numbers of women who remained unmarried despite societal pressures to wed. And sometimes I do, I do think of those successful and power-oriented females who have been climbing the ladder of life without any spouse. Don’t they feel the need of a partner? Will they die just being called a spinster having no children, getting old lonely? Or are they too busy to tie the knot? Or might be they don’t find a suitable match to have a marriage life. All these questions baffled my mind, so I had a discussion with few unmarried women about their opinion, life and career.

Some women believe that "marriage does not make you a complete person. You have to be a complete person before you can be married..." this is what a single woman says who is found more at parlors for a make-over. The parlors and spas are hit these days with single women who are going for weight-loss, liposuction, nose job and a complete new look. Also few are heartbroken with the family history of broken relationships and fear of increasing divorce rates. They question “If marriages are made in heaven, why there is divorce”. And somewhat women think after marriage they loose independence. There is a constant pressure from husband and in-laws to be at home and sacrifice career. She is in competition with fanatics always.

Other few don’t find a suitable partner. May be because, women are more likely to seek information than men, every working women wants a husband who earns more than her, who is good-looking, handsome, well-settled and qualified. Everything does not come in one package and women fail to understand. They spent larger amount of time at matrimonial sites, chat rooms and often feel sad, isolated, angry and rejected. Like Sabiha didn’t find her fate in the matrimony. She is 25 barely but working from 7 years in a call center to meet the needs of the family. She also dreams of a soul mate and wish to marry some day. But the time doesn’t permit her to settle that way. She feels sad, isolated and dishearten. She began to consume alcohol to forget her ultimate desire.

This is not just one case of dejected female, many unmarried females’ falls for obsessions. For instance, internet is a boon for the discontented people. A recent survey concluded that more and more females are serving net in comparison to last decade. The social networking sites like Facebook, Orkut, Myspace has number of women seeking for a relationship.

They are beautiful, they are successful, and they are popular but still lack something in life. And it is terrible that few women hate going home after work because they have no one waiting for them, if not in a relationship. Like in the Bollywood movie Gangster-A Love Story, Simran (Kangana Ranawat) finds it desolated when boy friend and gangster Daya (Shiney Ahuja) is at busy at work. She falls allegedly in love with someone else Akaash (Emran Hashmi), a cop in his absence.

However Fatima says “From a tiny tot, I loved the stories and keep asking my mother to repeat the same old story unless I started making my own. The story of how my parents met had been told to me many times. I knew it like most children know the story of Cinderella or other fairy tales I always dreamed of meeting someone and falling in love the way they did. And mind it; she is not a rare bird of those imaginary feathers. In words of Kripa if you get that one person in life, your life is perfect, you’re perfect in deed. I think the world keeps changing. But the women is same, she wants the same thing. A fairytale just like Cinderella, even now in the 21st century the world go round with the word-love. Every one wants to love and be loved. Marriage and relationship is a must-thing for you and also the society.

Nevertheless ness, we live in a very family-oriented and deeply cultural society where a good home is the BEST thing a woman can do. Till now people ponders (including men and women) that a women is successful only if she is married. Despite of having success and world at feet women still needs a shoulder to lie on, make love, cry and spend life with. Some agree, some not, few argue, few don’t listen. But there is potential need to every woman to settle down at some point of life because trouble shared is trouble half and women are men’s better half. To some extent it is false to say women are behind every successful man but men do stay behind each successful woman. And why not, men and women are no separate; they are two sides of a same coin. What do you say?

Diabetic Nerve Pain: 10 Foot Care Tips to Protect Yourself

By M H Ahssan

Diabetes can mean double trouble for your feet. First, diabetes can reduce blood flow to your feet, depriving your feet of oxygen and nutrients. This makes it more difficult for blisters, sores, and cuts to heal. And second, the diabetic nerve damage called peripheral neuropathy can cause numbness in your feet. When you can't feel cuts and blisters, you're more likely to get sores and infections.

If you don't notice or treat the sores, they can become deeply infected, and lead to amputation. A sad reality: having a toe, foot, or lower leg surgically removed is 10 times more likely in people with diabetes.

Diabetic peripheral neuropathy can also cause sharp pain in your feet. You may become excruciatingly sensitive to the lightest touch, like the sheets on your bed. Fortunately, a little TLC goes a long way in preventing foot problems from diabetes.

10 Tips to Protect Your Feet

Foot Care Tip 1. Check both feet daily.
Look over both feet carefully every day, and be sure you check between all of your toes. Blisters and infections can start between your toes, and with diabetic neuropathy, you may not feel them until they've become irritated or infected. If a physical challenge keeps you from checking your own feet, ask a family member to help.

Foot Care Tip 2. Wash with warm - not hot - water.
Wash both of your feet briefly each day with warm - not hot - water. You may not be able to feel heat with your feet, so test the water with your hands first. Avoid soaking too long in water, since waterlogged sores have a harder time healing. Dry your feet right away, and remember to dry gently between all of your toes.

Foot Care Tip 3. Make sure your shoes fit well.
It's an investment worth making. Even the slightest rubbing or misfit shoe can cause a blister that turns into a sore that becomes infected and never heals. Buy better-fitting shoes, or try different socks, even at the most minor signs of redness or irritation, since you may not be able to feel when it's getting worse. Before buying or putting on the shoes check your shoes for rough seams, sharp edges or other objects that could hurt your feet. And break your shoes in gradually.

Foot Care Tip 4. Skip the barefoot look.
Always wear shoes or slippers. Always wear socks with your shoes, since leather, plastics, and manmade shoe materials can irritate your skin and quickly bring on blisters. While you might prefer the look of hose, nylon knee-highs, or thin socks, you may find that these don't give your toes or heels enough protection. Wear thicker socks to pad your feet and cushion any calluses or sore spots.

Foot Care Tip 5. Speak up.
Nerve damage can be unpredictable. Tell your doctor about any changes in sensation in your toes, feet, or legs. Speak up if you notice pain, tingling, a pins-and-needles feeling, numbness, or any other unusual signs - even if it seems trivial to you. There's nothing small-potatoes about a potential foot amputation.

Foot Care Tip 6. Stay soft - but dry.
Your skin may be dry and cracked because of high glucose levels, and cracked skin means it's easier for bacteria to get under your skin and harder for infections to heal. Use a small amount of skin lotion daily, but be sure your feet feel dry - not damp or sticky - afterwards. Try not to get the lotion in between your toes. Keep your toenails trimmed and filed smooth to avoid ingrown toenails. You may find it easier to trim your nails after using lotion, when your cuticles are softer. Use a pumice stone after showering or bathing to softly file corns or calluses.

Foot Care Tip 7. Try non-impact exercise.
Swimming, cycling, yoga, and tai chi are increasingly popular ways to exercise - with minimal impact on your feet. Talk with your doctor before starting an exercise program.

Foot Care Tip 8. Fix bunions, corns, and hammertoes.
If your big toe slants sharply in toward your other toes, with a big bump on the knuckle of your big toe, you've got a classic bunion. Corns are spots of thick, rough skin, where the tissue builds up on toes constantly barraged by too much rubbing or pressure. A buckled-under toe, called a hammertoe, can result from muscle weakness caused by diabetic nerve damage. All of these make it hard to fit shoes comfortably. But a good podiatrist can help you fix these problems and take better care of your feet.

Foot Care Tip 9. Consider fitted orthotics.
A podiatrist can also fit you with shoe inserts called orthotics to support your feet if your have diabetic nerve pain or the muscles have become weak from nerve damage. If pain or weakness is so severe that it's too painful or even impossible to walk, a foot brace or orthopedic shoes might help. A podiatrist is your best source for these devices.

Foot Care Tip 10. Control your blood sugar.
The best treatment for nerve pain, ultimately, is to manage your diabetes well. In fact, a major study by the American Diabetes Association in 2006 showed that strict blood glucose control with intensive insulin therapy lowered the chances of having symptoms of peripheral neuropathy - tingling, burning, and pain - by 64%. While you can't control whether or not you get diabetic nerve pain, you can help control your glucose levels with diet, exercise, and mediations if you need them.

Your feet are your source of independence - or at least its foundation. Give your feet a little tenderness, a little loving care, each day. And be sure to have your doctor take a good look at your feet during each of your diabetes checkups, in case you missed anything.

SWINE FLU: WILL IT BECOME PANDEMIC?

By Henrylito D. Tacio

“The pig, though it has a split hoof completely divided, does not chew the cud; it is unclean for you. You must not eat their meat or touch their carcasses; they are unclean for you.”

This statement, taken from the Bible (Leviticus 11:7-8), comes to mind as the world watches the outbreak of swine influenza among humans in the Mexico and the United States. More than 100 Mexicans have been reported to have died.

In New Zealand, twenty-five students and teachers, some with flu-like symptoms, were quarantined and tested for swine flu after returning from a trip to Mexico. In London, a British Airways cabin crew member was taken to the hospital as a precaution after developing flu-like symptoms on a flight from Mexico City.

The Geneva-based World Health Organization (WHO) reported that some of those who died are confirmed to have a unique strain of flu virus that is a combination of bird, pig and human viruses. Because of this, the UN health agency declared the outbreak as a “public health emergency of international concern.”

WHO Director-General Dr. Margaret Chan admitted the outbreak “has pandemic potential” because it is apparently being transmitted from human to human. But she added it is far too early to predict whether a pandemic will occur. Pandemic happens when the virus is spread all over the world.

At the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) in Atlanta, Georgia, Dr. Anne Schuchat said containment of the outbreak was “not feasible.” As she told reporters in a telephone news conference, “Having found the virus where we have found it, we are likely to find it in many more places. It is clear that this is widespread, which is why we do not think we can contain spread of this virus.”

In the Philippines, the government is doing its best to prevent a domestic outbreak of swine flu. As the virus could be spread by infected traveler, the Manila International Airport Authority stepped up the monitoring of incoming passengers. Air travelers with fevers who have been to Mexico may be quarantined. “Together with other airport authorities abroad, we are heeding the call of the World Health Organization,” said Herminia Castillo, the international airport’s officer-in-charge.

In addition, the government has already banned the import of hogs and all other pork products from the US, which accounted for 27 percent of the 109.36 million kilograms of pork products imported last year. Mexico is not a major source of pork products for the country.

Pork and pork products sold in the market are safe to eat as no swine flu outbreak has been reported in the country yet, according to the Bureau of Animal Industry. In addition, swine-flu viruses are not transmitted by food, according to the CDC.

“So you cannot get swine flu from eating pork or pork products,” said the National Federation of Hog Farmers Inc. in a statement. “Eating properly handled and cooked pork or pork products is safe. Cooking pork to an internal temperature of 160°F kills all viruses and other foodborne pathogens.”

The Department of Health confirmed that there is no case of swine flu yet in the country. “However, we advise the public to still observe any preventive measures to avoid contraction of the virus,” Health Secretary Francisco Duque III urged during a recent press conference.

An advisory from the health department said people should cover their nose and mouth with tissue when coughing or sneezing, wash their hands regularly with soap and water especially after coughing or sneezing, and avoid close contact with sick people or crowded places.
A sick or feverish person should be closely monitored and stay at home to limit contact with others. When the fever and flu persists, doctors should be consulted immediately. “Refrain first from kissing or shaking hands with one another,” urged Dr. Eric Tayag, chief of the health department’s National Epidemiology Center.
There is no vaccine specifically protects a person against swine flu, and it is unclear how much protection current human-flu vaccines might offer. However, Dr. Duque pointed out the government has enough stockpile of the Tamiflu (oseltamivir), the anti-viral drug used to treat various types of flu.

Swine flu – shorter version for swine influenza – is a highly contagious acute respiratory disease of pigs, caused by one of several swine influenza A viruses. Although the morbidity rate is high, mortality is low and becomes higher only in complicated cases.

Swine flu viruses are most commonly of the H1N1 subtype, but other subtypes are also circulating in pigs (example: H1N2, H3N1, H3N2). Pigs can also be infected with avian influenza viruses and human seasonal influenza viruses as well as swine influenza viruses. The H3N2 swine virus was thought to have been originally introduced into pigs by humans.

“The virus is spread among pigs by aerosols, direct and indirect contact, and asymptomatic carrier pigs,” the WHO explains. “Many countries routinely vaccinate swine populations against swine influenza.”

Among pigs, the usual signs of swine flu are anorexia, fever, chills, and prostration. “Thumps or jerky breathing is observed, together with sneezing and coughing,” informs The Science and Practice of Swine Production. “Eye and nasal discharges are watery in the beginning, but later becomes sticky and mucoid. The condition may worsen and precipitate into bronchopneumonia which can lead to death.”

Sometimes pigs can be infected with more than one virus type at a time. “Although swine flu viruses are normally species specific and only infect pigs, they do sometimes cross the species barrier to cause disease in humans,” the WHO states.

Dr. Tayag said the swine flu virus is spread via aerial droplets and could be passed from pig to human or human to human. He said infected individuals could exhibit symptoms of the illness three to five days after being infected.

The symptoms of swine flu in people, the CDC says, are similar to the symptoms of regular human flu and include fever, cough, sore throat, body aches, chills and fatigue. Some people have reported diarrhea and vomiting. Like seasonal flu, swine flu may cause a worsening of underlying chronic medical conditions.

The WHO says people usually get swine flu from infected pigs. Human-to-human transmission occurs when a person has in close contacts with people who have the virus. It can pass from human to human via coughing, sneezing or touching infected people or surfaces, then touching the mouth, nose or eyes.

“If a swine virus establishes efficient human-to human transmission, it can cause an influenza pandemic,” the WHO warns. Dr. Tayag claims a pandemic usually occurs every 10 to 40 years, and that the last pandemic happened in 1968 (which killed about one million people around the globe).

Health experts claim a pandemic would deal a major blow to a world economy already suffering its worst crisis in decades, and experts say it could cost trillions of dollars

Women in India Form Their Own Political Party

By Aditi Bhaduri

The first all-women's political party in India has formed after 100 women joined. A first order of business is to boost female representation in parliament from 8 to 50 percent. Seventh in a series on the changing role of women in India.

It is a mellow April morning in Delhi. Soft sunlight filters through the trees that line the boulevards of the city's stately Krishna Menon Marg neighborhood.

Suman Krishan Kant, however, is oblivious to the tranquillity outside the windows of her well-appointed bungalow.

The prominent social activist is reviewing and paying bills while files wait on the table for her attention. The elegant waiting room outside is beginning to fill in with men and women hoping to meet with her and enlist her advocacy with government agencies on their behalf. One of them, for instance, is a widow who hopes Kant will help her application for an increase in her pension.

It is the beginning of another working day for the president of the country's all-women's political party.

In February, Kant, the widow of former vice president Krishan Kumar Kant, joined with other influential women to launch the United Women's Front to address issues such as women's illiteracy, early marriage and tokenism in parliament, where women hold just 8 percent of seats. To qualify for official party status, the group had to muster at least 100 members and pay about $300 in registration fees.

"Women have simply not been getting the kind of governance they deserve," says Kant. "Take Delhi for example. It has a female chief minister, yet it is one of the most dangerous places for women . . . All this is precisely because we do not have enough women in decision-making and in the political process. A few women here and there cannot make much of a difference."

Prem Ahluwalia is a journalist who specializes in women's issues and directs the Dehli-based Institute for South Asian Women, which seeks to foster ties among women in India, Nepal, Bangladesh, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, Afghanistan and the Maldives. She is also the United Women Front's national general secretary.

"It is for the first time in the history of India that a national political party has been formed by women," she says. "In fact it is the only party of women in the world. We need to ensure that the issues of priority concern to half of its population remain in the forefront of the pressing issues on India's national agenda."

Land of Contradictions
India is often called a land of contradictions and that pertains to the status of women here. The national constitution guaranteed women's legal equality in 1950. India also elected Indira Ghandi in 1966, making her the world's second female prime minister after Sri Lanka's Sirimavo Bandarnaike, who took office in 1960.

This past July Pratibha Patil was elected the country's first female president, a mostly ceremonial position that nonetheless leaves India with a female head of state.

Women hold top cabinets posts and at least three states have female chief ministers. Village councils reserve 33 percent of their seats for women.

On the other hand, millions of women live in poverty, illiteracy, malnourishment and ill-health. In November, the World Economic Forum's latest gender gap index put India among the world's 10 most gender-biased economies, with women's participation in the paid work force at 36 percent.

Recently, Sonia Gandhi, the female president of the All India Congress Party, the ruling party in the coalition government, said she was unable to pass a bill first introduced in 1996 that ensures 33 percent of parliamentary seats--the widely assumed critical mass--go to women.

The Ministry of Women and Child Development in 2006 drafted a bill for the prevention of workplace sexual harassment that was supposed to have been passed this year. However, it is still pending.

New Law Lacks Implementation
National statistics from 2005 to 2008 show 45 percent of Indian women suffer from domestic abuse. The Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act passed through parliament in 2005 and came into force last year.

Lawyers, however, widely lament that insufficient arrangements have been made for them to handle cases brought under the law. For instance, the trained personnel--counselors, protection officers, service providers--called for by the law are not in place.

The party has these types of issues in its sights. In the two months since its formation, however, it has focused on recruitment and making 50 percent female representation in parliament its chief objective.

So far the party has established organizations in 16 of India's 28 states. The groups vary in size. The Delhi chapter, for instance, claims 25,000 members; another state chapter claims 5,000.

The chapters are mainly led by veteran activists. The state of Orissa, for instance, has Shanti Das, a well-known union activist; Punjab has Pam Rajput, a prominent women's rights activist and scholar.

Men Join In
But that doesn't mean the party excludes men.

As Women's eNews visits Kant's office, in fact, Mohamed Shafique, 24, walks in, pulls out a file from the cupboard and starts leafing through it. He is preparing to begin the day as one of the party's workers in Delhi, which holds state-level elections in July 2008, the first test of the new party's ability to make a mark.

United Women Front is planning to field candidates for all 72 of Delhi's assembly seats. So far it is stressing education and safety for women and an end to all kinds of violence against women.

"We need the youth," says Kant, referring to Shafique, "because India has a young population." According to official statistics here, 50 percent of India's population of 1.1 billion in 2006 was under 25.

"We are not against men," Kant says. "We need men to work with us and we need their support."

However, she draws certain lines.

"Men will not be part of the national committee," says Kant firmly. "Men will be members of state chapters only; but we will have only women at the national level."

FEMALE INFANTICIDE: Think of the mother

By Kalpana Sharma

Even the most calculating and hard-hearted woman will not be indifferent to what happens to the child she has birthed. This is the reason that female infanticide remains a phenomenon restricted to only a few areas while sex selective abortions are rampant.

"Don't kill your daughter. The government will raise her," says Union Minister for Women and Child Development, Renuka Chowdhury. "It's a matter of international and national shame for us that India, with a growth of nine per cent, still kills its daughters," she adds.

Few will dispute the minister's sentiments or the concern that has prompted her to suggest the 'cradle scheme' to correct the skewed sex ratio in this country. She has appealed to women contemplating aborting female foetuses to instead bring them to full term and then hand them over.

Her concern about India's image is also not misplaced. At a time when the Indian media is full of stories of India's success in business, and prayers for its success in sports, the world media seems to have discovered precisely what Ms. Chowdhury speaks of — the fact that we also specialise in killing girls, or rather preventing them from being born. In the last month, leading newspapers in Britain and the U.S. have carried stories on this issue.

The 'cradle' idea has already been tried in Tamilnadu. The 'cradle baby scheme' was launched in 1992 to deal with the high incidence of female infanticide in some districts, namely Madurai, Salem and Dharmapuri. Women were encouraged to surrender their daughters rather than killing them. Over time, 188 reception centres for such babies were set up in primary heath centres and government hospitals across the state.

Mixed success
The scheme met with mixed success. While there appeared to be a drop in the incidence of female infanticide, it also became evident that women who had earlier killed their daughters now had the option of sex selective abortion. They managed to avoid giving birth to daughters altogether. So the need to kill them after birth did not arise. The scheme was unable to address the societal attitudes towards women that encourage and justify female infanticide.

This illustrates the problem that the current scheme is likely to face. It will not deal with the strong son-preference that lies at the root of the incidence of female infanticide or sex selective abortions. In fact, it changes little in terms of mindsets.

Also, while initially the plan might have worked in districts where female infanticide was prevalent, it will be far more difficult to implement in the hundreds of districts around India where sex selective abortions have skewed the sex ratio to such an extent that there are less than 800 girls to every 1,000 boys under the age of six in some of these districts. To persuade women to go through nine months of their pregnancy with a child they do not want, and then to abandon it, is expecting a lot. After all, so long as the pressure to produce sons remains, these women will have to continue trying. Does this mean, they have to go through multiple pregnancies to full term? Or does the minister hope that doing this once will cure the families of the urge to have a son? Women have always paid the price through their bodies for dominant social norms — such as the belief that only a son can be the rightful heir of property. This norm is so deeply ingrained that even a liberal education does not seem to alter it.

Expecting women to go through multiple pregnancies and abandon their girl children seems not just unrealistic but impossible. After all, even surrogate motherhood has faced innumerable problems as in the end, the women who conceive and give birth cannot bear to part with the infant after birth. Even the most calculating and hard-hearted of women will find it tough to go through the process of pregnancy and then be indifferent to what happens to the child she has birthed.

This is the reason that female infanticide remains a phenomenon restricted to only a few areas while sex selective abortions are rampant. Even though abortions also take a toll of women's health, they are rendered more impersonal because they happen within a few weeks of the pregnancy. Whereas killing or abandoning an infant after giving birth takes much greater physical and emotional toll on the mother.

Renuka Chowdhury must be commended for keeping the issue on the front burner. But she must be well aware that this kind of scheme, and the investment it will require, will not deal with the problem. Instead, the resources can be used to set up a machinery to ensure that the existing law, which prohibits sex selective abortion, is strictly implemented. Checking if all sonography machines have been registered could be one obvious way to start. In some places, where a vigilant bureaucrat has done this, there have been noticeable results.

Changing the mindset
But in the end, even the most strictly implemented law will not change the mindset, specially of the propertied classes who want sons to 'carry on' the family. This belief that the family is somehow not 'complete' unless there is a son has to somehow change. In the decade leading up to the 2001 census, it certainly did not change, as was evident from the Census statistics. We will now have to wait until the 2011 census to see if the multiple campaigns to promote the "girl child", to encourage parents to educate their daughters, to condemn the giving and taking of dowry and to expose those in the medical fraternity who knowingly transgress the law to facilitate sex selective abortions will have made a difference. These are social processes that cannot be assessed within a short period.

What is absolutely clear is that India cannot shine, or be poised to take off, if millions of girls are prevented from being born. This hateful reality must change if we are ever to consider ourselves a modern, democratic and just nation.