Kerala nun’s autobiography shocks and sells

By Maria Kutty

Nun Recounts Tales Of Sexual Exploitation And Discrimination In Convents

The explosive life story of a Kerala nun, ‘Amen — Oru Kanyasthreeyude Atmakatha’ (Amen — Autobiography of a Nun), by Sister Jesmi, is selling briskly in Kerala with its publishers having ordered a third reprint of 2,000 copies within weeks of its release.

Not long ago, a study had claimed that 25% nuns were unhappy in convents. Now, there’s more embarrassment for the church with Sister Jesmi, once associated with the Congregation of Mother of Carmel under the Catholic Church, recounting her harrowing ecclesiastical life in the autobiography, which she says, forced her to leave the convent. The revelations could further rattle the clergy that’s already in a spot with the Abhaya case.

Born C Meamy Raphael, Jesmi writes in her autobiography that she got her first rude shock when she was a novitiate. “At a retreat for novices, I noticed girls in my batch were unsettled about going to the confession chamber. I found that the priest there asked each girl if he could kiss them. I gathered courage and went in. He repeated the question. When I opposed, he quoted from the Bible, which spoke of divine kisses,’’ she writes.

Her second shock was from an ordained nun. “I was sent to teach plus-two students in St Maria College. There, a new sister joined to teach Malayalam; she was a lesbian. When she tried to corner me, I had no way but to succumb to her wishes. She would come to my bed in the night and do lewd acts and I could not stop her,’’ she writes.

In Bangalore for a refresher course in English, she writes, “I was told to stay at the office of a priest respected for his strong moral side. But when I reached the station, he was waiting there and hugged me tight on arrival. Later in the day, he took me to Lalbagh and showed me cupid struck couples and tried to convince me about the need for physical love. He also narrated stories of illicit relations between priests and nuns to me. Back in his room, he tried to fondle me and when I resisted, got up and asked angrily if I had seen a man. When I said no, he stripped himself, ejaculated and forced me to strip,’’ Jesmi recounts.

“It’s a very courageous work. It’s not easy for a person who has lived 30 years in a convent to bring out the undesirable things that happened there, particularly matters like jealousy and backbiting between sisters in responsible position,’’ said M V Pylee, first vice chancellor of Cochin University of Science and Technology.

Jesmi, who leads a retired life in Kozhikode, confirms claims made by the study about the discrimination against nuns.