My Column: The Perils And Pleasures Of Growing Old?

Why should we talk about the spirituality of growing older, as if it is something different? I need to, because as i grow older, i am discovering that my approach to spirituality is changing ­ i have to now integrate negative experiences along with positive experiences, interacting with people in a different way and being able to guide others graciously.


When we grow older, we are able to accept that there are many stars in the firmament of human life and that another's success in no way diminishes ours. We are thus able to frankly admire others and to compliment them without feeling threatened.

Of course, the need to watch our step more closely when we walk, the need to take the support of railings when we climb, if we can climb them, the difficulty we experience holding heavy objects in both hands and walking, the slower reflexes, the sometimes faltering memory , all these which would seem to come in the way of a positive approach to life are not really obstacles. They are only pointers to another reality .

That is why grandparents are more tolerant of the antics of children than parents. 

They have infinitely more patience and can sometimes spend hours just playing with children. There is no need to rush. The elderly are not driven by clocks. Old age is more about being noble. We are invested with resources that we have developed from life's bag of experiences that make us more considerate and patient with others.

There are of course the old who are perennial grumblers for whom nothing is ever righ for whom nothing is ever right.Complaints after complaints can make them sour and difficult to deal with. That is only one side of the story. Many are able to see life's brighter side.

The happy elderly can very well guide children through a game of cricket, teach them to play chess or wield a racket; even join them in a game of badminton. They are able to wax up a great relationship with their grandchildren, exchanging stories and jokes and even help them sort out relation ship issues.

When the mental and physical faculties of the old begin to deteriorate, that is the time when we have to accept the fact that life can never be the same again. All the chores that seemed so easy to do just a few years or even months ago now seem like daunting tasks. Howevs life and we need to learn to er, that's life and we need to learn to accept that.

As i grow older i have to check myself every time i think i can func tion at the same pace and intensity as i did when i was younger. Yes, now there are more natural pauses, more interruptions. There are fluctuations ­ the kind we never experienced when we were younger.

So my spirituality must now become a spirituality of adjustment.I have to adjust to doing what i have to do with many breaks. We seem to need many breaks ­ more silence and solitude, sometimes a little more friendliness and camaraderie. And sometimes we have to choose a quiet snooze or relax with a book or just enjoy doing nothing.

Every time my spirits dip, i can feel a sense that my eyes will close one day and i can also feel the assurance that my life will continue in some way . So, i seek to be a blessing to those who accept me. To those who don't accept me, i just let them be. 

Either way , getting older and more mature with each passing day is a grace from above.