Satire: Actor Shakti Kapoor Hopeful Of 'Hollywood Debut' After India Successfully Branded Country Of 'Rapists'

With India successfully branded a country of rapists thanks to a documentary made by a British producer and some myopic decisions by the Indian government, Bollywood villain Shakti Kapoor is confident that now he will get international offers for movies.

“Aaaoooo! mere toh achchhe din aa gaye,” blurted out Shakti Kapoor, who has played innumerable roles of a pervert harassing women on the silver screen, apart from getting caught in a sting operation on ‘casting couch’ on the small screen.


Kapoor’s hopes are not misplaced, experts believe.

“There was a time when India was considered to be a country of the occult, thanks to snake charmers and naga sadhus documentaries,” an expert pointed out, “And that helped Amrish Puri get a role in Steven Spielberg’s Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.”

“Then came documentaries on growing middle class and opening up of Indian markets, leading to rapid urbanization and slums,” the expert continued, “And that helped Anil Kapoor get a role in Danny Boyle’s Slumdog Millionaire.”

“Now we are a country of rapists. So Shakti Kapoor could as well get a Hollywood role. Since it has to involve some gruesome violence too, my bet is on Quentin Tarantino approaching Shakti Kapoor,” the expert concluded.

The expert showed tweets of rational scientists like Richard Dawkins to prove how India’s image as a country of rapists had become a reality, and thus it was obvious that people should look to benefit from it.

“Earlier only Pakistanis used to taunt India as rape capital of the world, but now the entire world is convinced that it is an integral part of our culture to rape women,” the expert explained.

According to sources, Shakti Kapoor has already made a CD containing his best roles, including his off the screen escapades, where he is seen harassing women and raping actresses in movies. He’s trying to approach the same PR agency that did the promotion and marketing of the 'India’s Daughter' documentary to reach the international audiences and create a global impact.

“If that fails, I hope the government of India bans my CDs or my movies and help me achieve my goal,” the Bollywood actor told.

Meanwhile a man with utterly disgusting views on women, who is lodged in Tihar Jail for suspected honor killings of his own daughter, has requested jail authorities to send his CV to interested documentary makers.