We are women. But with all the other roles that we play everyday, of a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mother, an employee, a boss, we forget to celebrate ourselves as woman. The demands of the other roles are such that it becomes about adjusting, sacrificing, meeting deadlines, pleasing and keeping others happy, and we forget to be happy.
Many mothers come to meet me to discuss about their parenting issues but 10 minutes into the session each one is talking about unfulfilled desires, inability to deal with daily stress. Each one is at some level of depression.
My teacher training students are young 20 to 30 year olds and yet when I interact with them or ask them about their dreams and goals I can see that their dream and goal has been compromised to suit that of their father or brother and ‘future' husbands.
Looks like the world of every woman revolves around the needs, demands, viewpoints, and goals of others. So we are forgetting ‘Me' instead of celebrating ‘Me'.
But I am glad to also meet women for whom the word Woman begins with the letter W that means the world is their oyster, they have taken charge of their world. They wear what they want and not just what they are told to wear and not also because they want to be different for the sake of being different. Our clothes define our values, our intellect, our culture, and us.
China and India have so much in common and yet if you go to Shanghai you will notice that women there are comfortable in what they wear, be it tight jeans, shorts or long dresses because the men don't ogle or judge their ‘character' based on their dress. The girls and women are so safe in their metros, on the streets and in crowded places. Its time to celebrate the freedom to wear let us make it our right in our personal constitution.
"Don't work. Because you don't know if your husband will allow you to work" many fathers still believe in this and many a young girl who has completed their M.com, MBA are twiddling their thumbs or keeping themselves busy with Mendhi or cooking classes so that she can become a ‘good wife'! Well woman take a leaf from the life of the television serial ‘Good Wife'.
Don't put your career on hold, who said good wives are only those that are barefoot and pregnant? Was Rani Lakshmi Bai only a housewife, Indira Gandhi?, Sarojini Naidu? Mother Theresa? Indra Nooy the head of PEPSICO? Come on, be the woman you want to be, that right is in the constitution of this country, now make it your right.
And the working women of this country, its great to see them delegating. Today's working woman is slowly realizing that she is contributing to the economy of the house and the country and so she puts her feet up on weekends, hires help. There is nothing wrong in keeping a maid, or using a microwave or washing machine. No point in trying to do everything on your own.
You are not only working for yourself, you are keeping the next generation happy and healthy because your work is contributing to the economy of this country and when you hire help and delegate you are creating jobs for others. Delegate. It's your right.
I am proud that I know so many women who have made their theme song, ‘No woman no cry..' and not ‘Baby doll...' During those few days of the month everyone of us may cry, because our hormones are playing havoc, we feel teary eyed about everything and when that happens take a break, chill, pamper yourself with a massage. You deserve it. And stop watching and identifying with the soaps on TV in which the women are always crying ‘abla naris'!
Make the TRP of these soaps come crashing down and believe me we will be a valued lot in this country. I say this because television and movies work unconsciously on emotions and mindsets so if we want to be respected then its time that the people around us do not identify or link our roles with the characters in these soaps because then they will expect us to be like the woman in stories and we will be guilty because we cannot and the merry go round continues. So lets get off the merry go round...now.
It is republic day around the corner and its time for the woman in all of us to celebrate the republic of ‘Me' because when we do that the republic of this country will be cherished and respected. Let us understand that all growth, new life, new beginnings always start with a woman and so if the women of a country cherish themselves then the others would celebrate them. Its time to stop asking for just a reserved quota in the constitution and celebrate the whole of our freedom, intelligence, creativity, desires, dreams, and responsibilities.
The republic day parade is a grand show of our countries achievements, constitution, defense, costume and culture and bravery. So on Republic day we celebrate our achievements, we advice, we seek no affirmations for our self worth. We need no one's permission to be happy, if charity begins at home then happiness begins with me. I am the boss of Me. And because I am the boss of Me, I know how to delegate, design, declutter, and detox my life. I celebrate #TheRepublicOfMe.
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