Indian Housewives- Awesome or Troublesome?

By Samiya Anwar

Are we traditionally bound or at default. Most people argue. The stereotypes continue everywhere. We, the women get a raw deal all over the world especially the 'Housewife' has always been a negative term. People (including men and women) consider it outdated And to be a housewife means something unfashionable, even retrogressive, though it is not anonymous that several women over centuries have been admired and honored as ideals of femininity for their deep devotion to their husbands and families. The ubiquitous of Sitas and Savitris still continue. Is this sound good or conflicting?

I was appalled to notice even the young girls I know in many countries give up their jobs after they get married and they are proud of it too. It is not easy. Stay-at-home is not worry-free. It is effortful. But still they choose to be at home and to them being a housewife means, being original and “you’re your own boss”. There are options of doing and managing house in our own way says my Reshma, 20something, a housewife. I wonder as to how. Is being housewife awesome or troublesome?

If we see, with increasing educational qualifications and economic independence, many women are breaking free and asserting their right to their own choices. It cannot be denied, right. But this rising self-determination is at a price. Very sad, marriages are breaking up. Divorces are on the rise, extremely bad and children are traumatizing, very awful. So I say there is no wrong being a housewife by choice. It is no shame and not by default in particular. All stereotypes are ridiculous because according to research by academics at the University of Virginia, 52% of modern housewives describe themselves as “very happy” with their marriages compared with 41% of working women

Housewives constitute a large section of the population, yet they have received very little attention. Talking about our country, India the housewives here are dressed in saris as traditional outfit and some put on shalwar-kameez. They are happy with the life they have and LOVE to spend the day cleaning house and cooking. Their world is limited to toddlers, grocery stores (tarkaari-bhaaji), day-time TV, and gossips with neighbors and moreover husbands. And mind it, most husband loves their wives to be housewives.

From a 3-year multi-site survey of India’s urban and rural women it is concluded that 2 in 3 women living in India’s cities are overweight. Surprisingly 66% urban women are obese. And why not, confined to four walls more women spend hours watching popular saas-bahu sagas. Thanks to Star plus Indian housewives are well-liked. They are addicted to television and in 8 out of 10 houses housewives feel a compulsion to watch the television. If not they feel bore and stressed with housework, it's sad. But a lot of these women sense loneliness. So, it is troublesome too.

Kavita, a housewife says, television is a great stress-buster. While, Nandani opines that Internet provides a large number of stress-free activities like blogging, gaming and chatting. And importantly Indian housewives are more religiously devoted to prayers and worship daily. Moreover, 80 out of 100 housewives are positive and don’t think they are burden to their male counterparts or as servants. They call themselves “homemakers” not housewives.

However other countries paint the world of housewives in a different way. A few, get married, without realizing what life in the West really involves especially U.S, Spain, Mexico, Canada, France and Germany - being a housewife is not the same as being a housewife in India - no family to call or visit, no friendly bai to chat or neighbors to gossip with, few places you can walk to, in larger cities. So most housewives spend time on home-made business, work-from-home jobs, etc. which becomes essential to beat boredom.

And nearly 55% of housewives involved in parenting as 24*7 job. They portray a complete different lifestyle from Indians. Largely, the time spent of Am-ree-kans is on computers, and gadgets. But they exercise and keep fit for the sake of husbands who hate to look at fluffy women. And the same when those women (housewives) return to India after spending a portion of life, it is a challenge to live in motherland. In the west the ladies half-of-their-life disburse wearing trousers, tank tops, and spaghettis, short skirts, slacks, etc. and find India backward and crummy.

They don’t like saris any more. These are the same ladies who once had a culture shock in U.S and other countries, now sport the western look in a confident manner. Though others in India often goes embarrassed with the talk and walk of those housewives and their alter ness. They start thinking contrary. Revealing skin and showing-off body is thought as hot and sexy. So, it causes trouble quite uncomfortable for them to live in own country after migration, they end up returning to abroad soon

And in the Gulf countries like Bahrain, Iran, Iraq, Israel, Jordan, Kuwait, Lebanon, Palestinian territories, Oman, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Syrian Arab Republic, United Arab Emirates, and Yemen the housewives are more pious and strict observant of religious laws and practices. The women migrating from other countries find the life there very different.

The housewives are not allowed to go out without husbands, so more and more women become housewives forcibly. If allowed, it is only in teaching profession the men support. By choice or default, women in gulf remain housewives raising children and performing religious acts. The housewives particularly in Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, Oman and UAE spend their leisure more in sleep and develop fat very easily. Sleeping becomes their hobby.

They also tend to become lazy in few years of stay which men and others in the family abhor. Unexpectedly, the young girls in 20-something look like aunties after a comeback, they are usually in double weight and more inactive. It is annoying and irksome. It was reported in a recent survey that the housewives spend 12-14 hours in sleeping as there is less to do in house, family members are also limited. Most of the housewives find the Indian families large and work tedious compared to the life of Saudi Arabia, truly.

Not surprisingly even to this day, housework is perceived by many societies as the natural role of women. Though some housewives say, working women are smarter and appealing as their life is not restricted. And some don’t feel for either growth or development, mostly those are rural housewives. Because today, it is seen that many housewives has managed to build career from homes. The hobbies of sewing, crafting, designing, writing, cooking has appreciated the “women in doors”.

A housewife is more like a “Domestic Engineer”, “Domestic Designer” who does a job of household. However, “To be a housewife is a difficult, a wrenching, sometimes and an ungrateful job if it is looked on only as a job. Regarded as a profession, it is the noblest as it is the most ancient of the catalogue. Let none persuade us differently or the world is lost indeed”. Well, being a housewife is awesome, not troublesome!